Went by the Clothesline Project today - I found my shirt and the Bean's from back in the DAY. Hers made me cry. *side note: I have no idea why I went through that stage where I never added the "g" in words ending in "ing." I think I thought it sounded more free and less formal, but I always put the apostrophe on the end, so it looks even MORE dorky and uptight and Caucasian than if I'd just put the effing "g" on there! I am such a total weirdo.* The clothesline has gotten so big! It took me over an hour to read all the shirts, and some of the stories are so sad that I can't imagine how people continue on with their lives.
I don't know why, but I was getting really annoyed at people who were talking while they were looking at it or even while walking by. I know it's not their issue and most people don't even know what it is, and that's not their fault and they probably mean nothing by it, but I just feel that that area should be, I mean, for lack of a better word, sanctified. It should be protected and shrouded in silence because it's such a visual platform for the expression of pain and healing that it's practically screaming already. These 4 guys came walking up and were laughing - like pointing at some of the shirts and laughing at the verbage or the pictures, as 18 year old boys are wont to do - and then they hit a series of the child abuse ones... not so much laughing after that. It's kind of crazy how powerful this thing can be.
There was this girl back when Bean and I were making our shirts that was making hers across the table - I didn't mean to, but I saw it while she was making it and recognized it when it was hung a few weeks later. It was so powerful and awful and private, and I hate that I took her anonymity away, but I found her shirt today, too, and as intrusive as it is that I know, at least by sight, who she is, I can't help but carry her with me. In earnest, I think of her every time I think of the project, and I hope wonderful things for her. I will never forget her, and her shirt affected me more than any other because I was wondering the whole time I was walking through if I'd recognize it, and when I did, it just - I guess it made me realize how important this project is. As silly as it sounds, we're bound, like bone-deep bound, because we started a healing process together in the basement of the Women's Center seven years ago - and then I just feel bound to everyone that made those shirts, and I care, I mean the way I care about my family, care about them and whether they're happy and am proud of the amazing people they've probably become and hope hope hope that they have found their peace like I've found mine.
At any rate, I love the Clothesline Project, and I'm proud of Virginia Tech for displaying it every year and giving survivors and their families a sounding board for hope and change. PLUS, it's colorful! AND it helps shut 18 year old A-holes the fuck up. *thumbs up sign* :)
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